We Are the Luckiest: The Surprising Magic of a Sober Life

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Laura has a way of making things that don’t make sense, make sense. And that’s an incredible skill for a human to have. Although this book is about sobriety, it’s also a book about growth, change, & evolution. It’s a book that teaches us that the things that break us, that we hate & curse, are actually the things that lead us to our magic, lead us home - to ourselves. ⁣ much the same way as I feel about becoming a mother: it has brought me right up to the nose of life itself and forced me to look it straight in the face. At first, the nearness was too much; there was nothing to protect me from the immediacy of things - not from the bright lights or the sharp pain. But then, eventually, I came to realize that this is what it means to be alive - to not look away from any of it - and that all I was really doing before was pretending: floating through my days half-numb, half involved, half-awake, thinking I was really living when in fact I was missing it all.” Until about 5 years ago, the "thing" that ran my life was perfectionism. Pair that with a demanding career (for which I got all kindsa high fives for said perfectionism), the challenges of new motherhood, a comparison habit, catastrophic thinking, a punishing intolerance for mistakes and an under-trained ability to notice and diagnose my own feelings... and more, but you get the point... and what you've got is a legit perfect storm.

We Are the Luckiest: The Surprising Magic of a Sober Life We Are the Luckiest: The Surprising Magic of a Sober Life

The mental load required to plan, monitor, adjust, control, and otherwise manage the proper or “ideal” amount of alcohol intake is exhausting to even imagine. I searched for that elusive third door for years, and I believe I would have died trying. In the end, it was far more peaceful to accept it wasn’t there. More critically, though, what I’ve gained from sobriety completely eclipses any loss. To think I would forsake all the gifts that have come from giving up alcohol so that I could find a way to fit a few ounces of liquid into my body each week is laughable. I can’t prove that moderation was scientifically impossible for me, but my inner knowing is crystal clear: I would never have touched a fraction of my own possibility if alcohol was still in my life. As Irish poet and philosopher John O’Donohue says, “The normal way never leads home.” Days later, I'm still thinking about parts of Laura's journey through active abuse of alcohol to the freedom of sobriety. Her words are startling, beautiful, and easy to understand. I will not be the only one who says that they relate to Laura and her story. I will be one of many who say, "This is ME!". I think that is the mark of an artist. The ability to write in a way that vastly different people relate because the author is inhabiting a space that is fully human. The truest story - the one that will always be truest - is that I am a human being, being human. Sometimes, I am my best self. Sometimes, not so much. But goddamn, I am trying to do better. I am always trying to do better. My guess is that you are, too.” No matter how far astray you’ve gone or how many times you’ve tried and failed before, as long as you’re still sitting here, breathing, and reading these words, freedom and joy are still possible.

My drinking — and whatever it is you do to feel better — was born of a natural impulse to soothe, to connect, to feel love. And although alcohol hadn’t actually delivered those things, it was absolutely yoked to them in my mind. In my heart and body, too. It was just what I knew.” Laura was the first person I found online in 2014 who was telling the truth about addiction & recovery. Ever since I found her, I’ve read every piece she has written, taken her online courses, and even participated in one of her yoga workshops and I don’t even yoga.⁣ Glennon identified this book - one which I gobbled down in 2 days flat - as one of her must-reads, alongside a little known work called "Just Mercy" and an author you've never heard of named GLORIA STEINEM. Eek.

We Are the Luckiest - Libby We Are the Luckiest - Libby

I had high hopes for this book because I heard so many good things about it. I just finished it and I think it’s OK. There’s nothing Earth shattering about it. I’ve definitely read better books, and I’ve definitely read worse. This is one of those books I’ll read once and that’ll be that. It’s supposed to be difficult. It’s supposed to take everything you have. It’s supposed to take longer than you want and to change you, completely. This often won’t feel good when it’s happening, but nothing worth having ever does." My friend Meadow's definition of intimacy...she says, "Intimacy is having a kind, compassionate witness to your truest thoughts and feelings."The antidote to loneliness wasn't just being around others or sharing common ground. It was intimacy. Which is the way we fool ourselves, isn't it? Life isn't a comparison game. It's not about whose stories are the most awful, or who really deserves the biggest shame. It's not even about the stories we hold on to so that we can stay in the places we are, the places that don't serve us but are so hard to walk away from. I am not as bad as that, so I can keep doing what I do to numb my feelings, my life, my nows.